This was an actual direct mail piece that a now defunct bank sent out a few years ago.
I won’t say their marketing was the only thing that caused them to go bankrupt. In reality, their criminal business practices were the main reason the FTC shut them down (you can look it up if you want) but if this is the kind of promotion those geniuses came up with, then their marketing sure didn’t help keep them afloat.
To set the scene, before you read the entire letter…
This piece was mailed to business owners offering them a business line of credit. As you look it over ask yourself… “Would you trust this bank with your personal and business information”?
First, here’s the envelope (the recipient name and address showed through the window)…
And now here’s the actual letter that was enclosed…
No my friend, that is not a page full of typos.
80% of this piece is nothing but the word “blah”.
And except for the recipient name and address being blacked out, this is the actual, unadulterated sales letter the company paid to produce, and mail to millions of people.
I can only imagine someone at corporate thought this letter was clever. But this kind of clever doesn’t sell anything.
So for any young copywriter who thinks they’re not good enough… Just remember, someone got paid to write this piece of shit. And if you believe you can do better than this, then don’t give up.